That little bitch called discontent

Sun sets...
*looking out to the horizon*
...of trees, cow shit, and more trees....
I can't see the sunset after all,
why? were in the middle of a mountain resort of pete's sake.

It's almost 5-ish..i think. I really don't know. I think my watch is busted, seeing as my philosophy of life never reminded me that you should never go swimming with your watch still attached to your soon-to-be wet skin. It was too late after all.

Then of course, silence. I watch in envy as my classmates (who, after all the swimming, resembled tomatoes) go out of the pool and eat, sing in tune in the local karaoke bar, and of course, play in the hot sun. That of course, is their life. I on the other hand, have completed my mission to swim, apply sunblock, swim, apply sunblock, swim, apply sunblock, stop swimming, apply even more sunblock.

I thought this was going to be a fun outing, with our dear moderator, laughter and so much giddy. But the absence of our moderator being with us in the pool (Instead he goes "consultation-y on us) made us, scratch that, made me feel bored. But don't get me wrong, the outing was fun, and uh, fun. Then again, I sit there, wondering why I chose not to be with my classmates.

*wondering mode*

*light bulb!*

Then, I realized, I'm not happy. Why? Even I don't know. But I have a hunch...could it be that my summer plans have something to do with it? Probably.

*thinks for a moment*

I think that since I have a lot of things to do this summer (things that I have never done...by the way, these are shallow things)..I guess I'm afraid to NOT do them and end up miserable. If you're innately chismoso or chismosa, you're probably wondering what are some of those things. Well, to keep you from wondering, it's about my weight. (a million shouts all over the world..S-H-A-L-L-O-W!) Yes, my weight keeps my morale and self-esteem low. But, I have seldom bothered about my weight as of now, and you can say that I have already learned to accept a person's individuality. But, you don't get it. As I gaze upon the pictures from my camera and see how..somewhat fat I am, it kinda makes me, annoyed? Actually, I'm not and will never be contented with how I look right now. That's why I plan to change my wheel of fortune this summer.

Yes, discontent is a bitch.